Biology 101

Today was a day of Biology. We started off the morning with Lil' J showing me how he squeezed "boobs" out of balloon.

Then J the Great had a lively discussion about his "pimples" (nipples) and how one stuck out further than the other and how boys only had 'pimples' and not 'boobs'.

After supper, Lil' J and J the Great questioned me about why 'girls don't have a penis'.

Just to let you know, I graduated with a degree in Biology, so I'm all about calling body parts what they are.

However, I found it difficult to describe the difference in a way that they would understand. They've asked this question before, yet somehow today I found it oddly awkward to name the female parts with the correct terms. Seemed....well....wrong or private.....or something.....

Anyway, I avoided the whole naming issue by saying, "Boys have a penis and girls don't. They pee pee out of another hole."

Ya...getting in too deep here already.

"Where does the baby come out of?" asked J the Great. I saw that coming from a mile a way.

"Well, that comes out of another hole. So actually girls have 3 holes and boys have two."

OH MY WORD, DID I JUST SAY THAT?

So then I try to clarify, getting a little flustered in the process:

"Boys have a hole that pee and sperm (WHAT?) come out of, and another hole for poop. Girls have a hole for pee, a hole for babies and a hole for poop"

WHAT????????????????

"Oh, ya!" both boys said, as if it made perfect sense.

I really don't hope they don't bring this up in casual conversation with their little friends. "Well, my mom said girls have THREE holes!"

Oh My Word. I.Need.Some.Help.

Or maybe a drink.

P.S. Try describing what "adultery" means to a 7 year old. He was reading his Bible book we use for school, of all things. Not sure how well I did.....if Mr. J happens to let you know what it is, you can tell me if I did a good job explaining it.